Let It Go (Part 2)

Let it go… Seems so simple doesn’t it? I agree and admit that this needs to happen. Forgiveness is something God gives us when we repent and we should forgive others as we have been forgiven. As Matthew West’s song says, when we forgive, ‘the prisoner that it frees is you.’

The problem comes when someone throws this out as the answer but walks away condemning you. It’s similar to the scripture about physical needs. James 2:15-16 Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?
You can tell someone who is emotionally wounded to ‘let it go’ but if you don’t take time to help mend their wounds, your words are just more judgmental than helpful. These people need encouragement, love, and lots of prayers. Their faith in people needs to be restored and their hurts need acknowledged and even validated. They need time to grieve their pain and anything that has been stolen from them.

Sometimes ‘Let it go’ implies that the person is purposely holding on to the hurt and pain by choice. They were often victimized by people and left to pick up the pieces by themselves. Telling them to ‘let it go’ is often like telling a blind man to see, a deaf man to hear, or a crippled man to walk. Yes, these things are possible, but only by a miracle. This is often how impossible it feels. Thankfully, we serve a God that is not bound by impossibilities. Whether God chooses to heal or miraculously deliver is solely up to God, but giving it to God is the key.

Emotionally wounded people did not choose this path. It’s like the person in the Bible that was traveling and fell among thieves and left in the ditch to die. Dealing with a wounded person requires us to go out of our way and possibly get dirty in the process. Religious people will often just pass by those who are hurting, judging them, blaming them for finding themselves in this position. Thank God for ‘Good Samaritans’ that show compassion, pick them up, take them to get help, and even invest in their healing.

Now at this point I must admit, this might need to be a three part series because I’d love to tell you how to ‘let it go’ but at this point the only answer I have is to choose to forgive as in the Lord’s Prayer. Matthew 6:12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. also the Bible tells us that we must do this. Matthew 6:15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; This will place the person or people in God’s hands. Our trust is not being placed in people to do the right thing, but for God to do the right thing. He is the only one able to heal our wounds and do what is best for everyone involved in the situation. Pain often makes us self-centered, how could it not? Pain grabs our attention and we must consciously choose to direct our focus on other things.

When the disciples encountered a blind person, they began to question why it had happened. Matthew 9:1-3 And as Jesus passed by, he saw a man which was blind from his birth. And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind? Jesus answered, Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him. Sometimes people would rather question whether a person did something to deserve their circumstances instead of thinking that God allowed it just for the purpose of showing others how He is able to take care of their needs. God knows what He is doing and we don’t need to figure anything out about the person who is in need. All we need to do is bring them to God and allow God to do His thing, He will take care of the rest, completely.

As I stated in the beginning, ‘Let it Go’ is a great key to unlocking someone’s healing, but understanding will go a long way in helping someone find this key. Criticism and misunderstanding will only keep the person’s wounds open and unhealed, allowing bitterness to infect them and infection only leads to death. As hard as it may seem, try putting yourself in the wounded person’s shoes. Are your words what you would want to hear? Would your actions help if you were in their situation? Would like like people to look at you the way you have looked at people who find themselves locked up in depression and anxiety? Luke 6:31 And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise. You might one day find yourself in need of some help. Would the words ‘let it go’ be enough for you?

Let It Go (part 1)

A popular Disney movie made this phrase very popular with its hit song of the same name. Let it go. I have two thoughts on this subject, the first of which has to do totally with the message portrayed by this movie, at least how I understood it.

When I first heard the song, without seeing the movie, immediately I felt my spirit to be checked. I could hear the tones of rebellion being celebrated and thought this is not a good thing, no matter how much anyone could relate to it. I heard phrases alluding to how being good had been such a struggle and no longer was this going to be a goal. Let me just say, after seeing the movie, I have since had a new perspective, especially when seeing along side my own struggle.

I could seriously relate to this person, Princess Elsa. She had been given a unique ability that could be useful, but instead had become a curse to her when she accidentally hurt someone she loved, her sister. So let’s just say it was her problem. Also, if the subjects of this kingdom found out about it, she would have been shunned or possibly banished. In order to protect the ones she loved, she kept herself in isolation and silent. How so terribly sad. No one to share this burden with; no one to give her support. In addition, the people she loved knew nothing of her sacrifice for them so didn’t feel loved, but instead felt that she was cold. She didn’t want to accidentally freeze them, but in fact that’s exactly what she did, figuratively.

One day, when her presence was required, she was confronted by her sister and her secret was revealed. This caused her to respond naturally by flight, running away. In a sense, she now felt freedom because her secret was out, she no longer had to hide, but could finally ‘let it go!’ The trouble is, she’d been doing this alone for so long that ‘doing the right thing’ had become such a heavy burden so rebellion actually felt good. She was still wrong and still alone. She went from one extreme to another. She need help now more than ever.

Bravely and out of deep love, her sister decided to search after her. When she finally allowed someone to get close, she was able to find the help she needed. So, two things, when you try to hide things in your life, you won’t be successful, you will only make it worse. And the lesson for those outside looking in, if you see someone who is closed off or seemingly difficult, it may be a warning that someone is in need.

This is what is so beautiful about grace. It is undeserved. When you treat people in a manner they deserve, they expect that, but when you give people unconditional love and mercy as Jesus did, you will impact them. Similar is the story of the woman caught in adultery. When drug before the crowd and brought to Jesus’ feet, she expected judgement, but instead was given mercy. This did so much more to encourage her to change than any sentence.

Romans 6:1-4 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein? Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

Now you ask, why are we talking about sin when this started out as a post about people with ‘problems’? Well, here’s the thing, sometimes our behavior problems will lead us into sin, especially when they aren’t dealt with or when we try to do it of our own accord. This creates a never ending cycle. Behavior problems lead to sin which lead to more behavior problems due to the guilt and shame, but Jesus broke this cycle by offering His life as a sacrifice for our sins.

Isaiah 53:5-6 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.

The Word gives us encouragement when dealing with our weaknesses. Paul was tormented and asked for help and here was God’s response:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.

God is well able to deliver us from our places of torment, but sometimes He chooses to use them to help mold us into real gems and is wanting us to learn to lean on him while we are still in the struggle. The key is to walk with Him daily. I often visualize it as if He is giving me stones, one at a time, to walk across a stream and I won’t see the next one until I use the one He has provided for me today. If you will trust Him, He will not fail you. I have accomplished quite a life for someone dealing with my issues, but the reason has been all glory to God. As the song says, I don’t have to understand, I just need to hold His hand.

No Better Time Than the Present

Many of my previous posts have been more of a production, well thought out with scriptures and complete thoughts, but I’m thinking of changing it up a bit. I feel led to be more transparent in my journey to find healing in an attempt to relate to my target audience, the emotionally wounded.

I must admit, I thought about putting this off, and then I read the headlines: Robin Williams, Dead at 63 from an apparent suicide. How sad! Then my heart was pricked, this just can not wait any longer. In my search for help, I want to help someone else.

It has been very hard for me to talk to anyone about the fact that my heart is so wounded, still after all these years, but some of the wounds are fresh or a combination of old wounds that keep getting reopened and not allowed to heal. I always feel like I have failed God or that I might be a bad witness if I were to reveal my struggles, but the time has come to face the music and see God use my life for his glory. Besides, the thought came to me today; God does not need me to protect His reputation.

Just recently I started seeing a therapist to help me sort through some of these issues. After unloading some of my past, about half, she looked at me and asked, How did you ever survive? Now this was comforting because I felt like, finally, someone was acknowledging that I had faced some very difficult struggles. My answer was, it was God!

At this time, my encouragement is never give up. Keep looking for answers. Keep believing God’s Word. Keep praying and going to church. Personally my hope always was, this world was not the end, I’m going to a better place, Heaven. As I search for and find some answers, I will be sharing them or sometimes share nuggets from my journey that have helped me this far. One thing is for certain, I do not want this battle to be in vain, but all for the glory to God!

Besides the Bible, of course, I am currently reading two books that I have found to be extremely helpful. A Bend in the Road, by Dr. David Jeremiah and It Will Never Happen to Me, by Claudia Black, PhD. I have been posting many of Dr. Jeremiah’s key quotes on Twitter, but I will start trying to share them on here as well. If you know someone struggling, please send them my way, I really care and want to help.